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Thursday, April 9, 2009

自从欣雨离开以后,展鹏的心里的那一块也被她带走了,剩下的只是一个空虚的躯体。不断地尝试去寻找回自己的灵魂,也曾经尝试让忙碌的生活填满空虚的心灵,希望疲惫的躯体能够忘了自己失去的那一块。结果换来的是更加的空虚与寂寞,还有更多的痛楚……忙碌的生活,失去了目标与焦点,也忘记了自己是谁。告诉别人自己是个冰冷的机器人,只会做工,只会读书,自己失去情感也不顾及身边每一个人的感受。


心里的痛比身体的痛难熬。失去了她就好像失去了全世界;被她遗弃就好像被全世界遗弃了。想让身体痛来让自己忘记心里的痛。希望自己遇上几个恶匪,跟他们来场恶斗,伏诛他们,也让他们在自己身上捅几刀。死去就算是一种解脱,也不白死,活着也至少有一些贡献。


依稀记得跟她拥抱时,总是觉得我们本来就是一体的两个人的感觉。无法忘了自己的那一块被硬生生扯开的痛楚。不明白为什么原是一体的两个人会分开结果。曾经以为那就是所谓的天长地了……后悔自己当初为她放弃了全部朋友,受伤后没有人来安慰,这只能怪自己太单纯了。不明白为什么童话依然是故事,但是终于知道现实总是残酷的了。


痛真的让人长大吗?思念着她时,心总是楚楚的痛着,仿佛要逼自己要忘记她。但是,真的能忘了这甜蜜的回忆吗?应该让这甜蜜的回忆留在心中吗?无法忘记第一次对白的码头与黄昏,无法忘记跨越友谊的高原,无法忘记她微笑点头的堤防,无法忘记一起去过的每一个地方,更无法忘记2009年的约定……都忘不了。童话里都是骗人的……First and the last?都是骗人的谎言!


恨,恨她离开时也带走了自己的心,恨这世界怎么没有其他能够填满自己的心灵的人?怪自己太爱她,怪自己不珍惜她,怪自己当初狠狠地给了她那挽不回的巴掌。但是更多的还是遗憾……遗憾自己失去美好的,遗憾连朋友都不如,遗憾当初自己放下爱情选择了面包,遗憾这世界又多了一个最熟悉彼此的陌生人。


也许,上天早就已经注定他们不能在一起了。水里的鱼(欣雨)怎么能跟天空中的鸟(展鹏)在一起呢?有人说:“何必在乎天长与地久,至少曾经拥有过就好……”如果真的能永远在一起,还有谁会在乎曾经拥有?既然已经注定不能在一起,再难再痛也应该有个了结了吧!想将她还回来的戒指带到她微笑点头的堤防投进海里,想将过去美好的回忆写成小说、拍成电影。


事隔多年,痛也不再痛了。等待着她的银表也停了下来……听说她的未来也有了安排,想要祝福她。展鹏真的将她放下了……很快,展鹏就像自己的名字像一只展开翅膀的大鸟也去寻找自己的未来与梦想了。虽然,很想要再次恋爱来证明自己已经痊愈了……但还是很怕,怕自己无法找到一个比她更好的,怕自己再次受伤害, 怕自己无法对另一个人像对她一样好……希望找一个能够填满自己心灵的另一半,希望有人能够像她这样了解自己,希望有人能够比她更能体谅自己,让自己也能够同时有时间给朋友、家人和事业。


人,就只有这短暂的一辈子。但是往往一起走到最后的,很多时候都不是一起开跑的人。在完全放下之前,不想对不起别人,所以不想任何恋爱。前程茫茫,不知道自己会怎样,所以也不敢恋爱,怕辜负了别人。当然,也不能让自己随便跟一个单纯的小妹妹说会天长地久……如果发生的一切好像偶像剧一样完美,谁还会有这样多担忧了?学习向现实低头,将一切交给未来吧!


终于领悟喜欢、爱和能不能永远在一起是三件不同的事。喜欢是可以来自单方面的,也不需要任何回报,爱则是来自双方面的,但是能不能永远在一起才是现实。

Friday, January 30, 2009

Flash in mind

Recently, this concept came into my mind. Be appreciated whenever you have a choice in hand, and don’t blame anyone or anything when you don’t have choice!


When we have the right to choose, we can choose the best option available. Doesn’t matter the result is good or bad… We already do with our utmost ability. This is the best we can do… The rest is fate.


Another thing, I’m more respect those who have better personality if compare with those who with better ability. Is not the matter of how many great things that you did to this world, but how good are you in being a human being.


You must be a good mankind before you consider good in anything… I strongly believe in this! What happened recently remind my believing.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Something funny on Youtube..

This is something funny i found on youtube during my boring Chinese New Year...























Sunday, December 28, 2008

Third Semester

The third semester of my university life had come to its end. And the fourth semester will be starting soon. I have a total of six semesters to be in UTM, now three had pass. That mean I had gone through the half way of my university life. In another one and half year time, I’ll end up in working environment. I hope the economy will be better after I enter working environment.

For the third semester, I would like to make some conclusion. This is an unhappy semester for me here. I feel not satisfy for the relationship with all my friends and not satisfy with what I faced in activities.

First of all, I would like to comment on the activities. I don’t mean that the activities I joined is not good nor wasting my time. But I think I have other better option in my personal improvement. Actually I have a higher expectation to university activities. And I also believe that the activity environment is the best place for us to grow. I believe that the activity environment should let everyone to dream and realize their dream.

If comparing to my thesis, I think I can realize what I thinking through my thesis. So, I’ll put down some of my activities and concentrate to my thesis. Besides that, I feeling the first class honour is very important to me. I can have more option in choosing my working environment in future.

About friends, I feel sad because not being understand and feeling uncomfortable with my best friend’s admirer. Anyway, I feel much after the holiday. Thank you to Yee Teong, because he make me smile when I tell him what I faced here. I’m not born yesterday night! What I want is true friend, I don’t need entertainers. I know who is true to me and who isn’t true to me.

Finally, is about my love. Before I back to Penang, Wan Ping called me, she asked whether I’m joining our church caroling for this Christmas. Besides that, she also asked when I can bring my girl friend back to Penang. Actually, I feel that many people concern about my love, think that I should have a girl friend now.

But, I have my different thought here. I think I shouldn’t involve in any relationship until I finish my study. There are a few reasons why I’m doing this. First I don’t have enough resource to have any relationship at this stage. I don’t have time, money and cannot provide any secure to my lover. I don’t know where to go after my graduation. Now, taking care of myself already become problematic. So, is impossible for me to take care of another person.

Some may ask me. What if I meet a suitable one and she like you too? My answer is if the suitable one is belong to me, she never run. If the love is true, let it be in trial. The time will prove it to me! Don’t you feel wasted? You don’t afraid to be single? If the love is not true, I found no reason to own it, rather be single. If can together for lifetime, why cannot wait for one and a half year?

The fourth semester is going to start shortly. Hope everything will be fine in the coming semester. Wish that I won’t make a wrong decision for my future here. And wishing everyone good luck in coming semester!

Friday, December 26, 2008

Georgetown as a world Heritage Site: The Untold Story-Heritage Cries

This year, Georgetown and Malacca is recognized as the world heritage site by UNESCO. This is the first time UNESCO award the world heritage status that shared by two cities. This is a good news for Malaysia.

However, the status of world heritage site will be forfeited if one of the cities no longer fulfill the requirements or do not obey any article in the agreement. So, this had become worries of both the cities behind the glory of getting the award.

According to “Rumours”, the idea of joint application came out due to Georgetown is too Chinese. Therefore, they suggested Malacca to join in the application to show that this is Malaysia with multiracial culture. Compared to Malacca, Georgetown had done a more complete research on her heritage buildings. Again, due to some politic views, Georgetown had to reduce the paper documentation during the application, so that both cities looks like equally attractive to the world heritage status.

UNESCO only accept the application from the recognized federal government of a country to ensure that the heritage site is fully protected by the government through laws and enforcement. According to “Rumours” again, the reduced paper work done is not that satisfied as something expected by the panel. But still, both cities are entitled the honor for their colourful historic background.

After the 308 election, DAP had won the control of Penang state government. However, the new government still lack of awareness in taking good care of Georgetown heritage building until today. In term of efficiency, they are excellence. They can approve a development project within a month period. But, the problem is the project they approved is somewhere near our glorious city. Besides that, the people involved also lost some precious documentation of heritage buildings during the inter-changing of state government.

According to the study of three Germany students under ASA program, the heritage buildings of Georgetown are not maintained well. There are more than ten thousands of shop house that old enough to be protected as heritage building in the inner city of Georgetown…

I feel sad when I reading the report…

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

The Thermometer of LOVE

Not sure whether you are falling in love with someone? Think of the statements below and evaluate how true is the statements.

This article is taken from TIME Megazine (4th February 2008). Just want to share with friends here:

First, fill in the blanks with his/her name.

Then, evaluate every statement below by rating from 1(Not true at all) to 9(Definitely true).

1. I would feel deep despair if ___ left me.

2. Sometimes I feel I can’t control my thoughts; they are obsessively about ___.

3. I feel happy when I am doing something to make ___ happy.

4. I would rather be with ___ than anyone else.

5. I’d get jealous if I thought ___ were falling in love with someone else.

6. I yearn to know all about ___.

7. I want ___ physically, emotionally, mentally.

8. I have an endless appetite for affection from ___.

9. For me, ___ is the perfect romantic partner.

10. I sense my body responding when ___ touches me.

11. ___ always seems to be on my mind.

12. I want ___ to know me—my thoughts, fears and hopes.

13. I eagerly look for signs indicating ___’s desire for me.

14. I possess a powerful attraction for ___.

15. I get extremely depressed when things don’t go right in my relationship with ___.

Finally, add up your total. Your score can range from a minimum of 15 to a maximum of 135. The higher your score, the more your feelings reflects passionate love; the items for which you picked a particularly high number indicate the components of passionate love you experience most.

Moving in...

Hey friends, welcome to my new blog...

To those who support my previous blog at frienster, thank you for your continue support. And sorry for inconvenient.

Hope you enjoy reading my blog.

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